Let Me Tell You How I Really Feel

You're like a ruthless African dictator
Trying to wade across the stream of humanity
In full dress uniform
With sashes, and medals, and accouterments
Pacing nervously along the shore
Afraid to step in and get wet

Maybe you realize that we humans
Don't like people who think only of themselves
Maybe you're afraid of what we'll do to you
Once you struggle across the stream
And reach humanity on the other side
You should be afraid,
Because we'll tear you apart

You're every woman I've ever hated
Every woman I've ever loved
You're a push
You're a shove
You're a seven-year itch
You're a post-modern Lady Macbeth
You blood-sucking bitch

In Love With You Again

I fell in love with you again today
I was at Starbucks
With my son
I saw a girl who
Looked a lot like you did at eighteen
Her hair, her skin, her face
Even the clothes on her back
And the shape of her nose
She made me fall in love with you again
Then, after the coffee cake
And biscotti were finished,
And my cafe Americano was empty,
We left
And as I walked by,
She looked up and smiled at me
I couldn't smile back
I just looked at her through my Ray Bans
And thought of you

In and Out

Red skin
Pulls me in,
I'd put out
Without a doubt

Reveal

Flashing light
White haze
Blinds my eyes
While you amaze
The silent rise
Rising up to touch your bliss
But there's poison on your lips,
Danger in your finger tips,
And darkness
In the corner of your eyes

If we knew
All the truth
And all the lies
I would love
And you'd despise
That, I'm quite sure of,
But I don't know why

Blind me again,
But not from you
The white flash
Comes from behind, now
And I can't see you
When you're up on stage
I'll promise to love you
Through and through
I have got the darkness, too
But we can cure it,
Just me and you

Carol

Raging fucking lunatic
Ruin my perfect day
Like a cow birthing a calf,
We have to listen to you
Moo and bray
I wish you would shut
Your mouth
And simply go away

Car Crash and You

Your breath is like Chanel Number Five
Your hair is like New York City
With legs like a parking garage
And a tongue like the Metro

You remind me of a car crash
Where everybody lives,
But they find out that they
All have a mysterious, secret connection
Unknown to even them
Until, in the aftermath of the crash
While they're sorting things out,
They all discover the evil, secret lie
That binds them one to another

It's a terrifying thought
Because we both know
And have seen these things before
There it is,
Go through it,
Now it's your turn
To go out the door

Compromise

I've come to where I am today
I've compromised my life away
Maybe I can go back?
"It's never too late," they say
But you can never go back
Because there is no way
All that's left
Is to compromise, compromise, compromise
And compromise some more
Just keep on compromising until your life's a total bore
And, please, take it from me
If you compromise yourself,
You will be

Trapped

Can't get out and can't get in
The bars are closed
Confined within
Maybe forever
Maybe not
What's it like to be free?
I've been stuck here so long,
To be honest...
I forgot

The Funkmaster General

I'm the Funkmaster General
I've got fortune and fame
When the girls want to do me,
The call me by name

"Funkmaster General,
Come out and play!
Make us feel funky,
Happy and gay

"Make us feel giddy,
Make us feel right,
Give us the funk
We've been craving all night!"

New Love

Cupid has already shot the arrow in
Now he sits on my shoulders
With his cute little butt on my neck
Fucking the arrow in and out of my heart
Like Regan slamming her crucifix
Inside a box of red corn syrup
Or a little girl
Sticking a hot dog
Through a doughnut
Love is a hostile,
Violating,
Penetrative act

What you call love,
I call the rape of my
Natural emotions

Just leave me alone,
Cupid go home!

The Holy Stage

Wooden boards
And wooden pew
What's the difference
I ask you

Fill the church
And fill the seats
Offer sacrifice
Of meat

Here's an actor,
There's a priest
Who can truly
Slay the beast

Memorize your lines,
Rehearse,
Try to learn
Your bible verse

Touch your soul
Or touch your heart
Which could tear
Your world apart

Worship with the
God of vine
Then drink the
Sacramental wine

Choose the one
And not the other
Now, turn around
And kiss your brother

Performer

Leave yourself open,
Don't close the door
Your glimmering soul
Brings us clawing for more

Broken Love

Tears falling
Through eternity,
Never ceasing
Love broken
Two souls
Ripped at the seams
The heart torn in two
Forever broken
Loving me,
Loving you
Through eternity,
Never ceasing
As long as we're together,
Time can't touch us
Through the hourglass
Sadness falls
Against our will
Hate and anger
Distance fill
Tears falling
Our love
Will haunt us forever
Through eternity,
Never ceasing

Woman in Tan

Standing, standing, standing
Everywhere I look
Waiting at the bus stop
(perhaps you are a cook)

Waiting for your husband
He'll give you a ride
You're such a beastly woman,
Yet he took you as a bride

You look so bloody British,
Like the Queen, but wearing tan
Somewhere deep inside, I'm sure that
Once, you were a man

You're not from California
You must be from afar
Or did somebody free you
From that ooey, gooey tar?

You're truly prehistoric,
But I'm sure you're rather nice
And if you will permit me,
I'll give you some advice-

When it comes to fashion, dear,
You're really quite a bore,
That jacket came from K-Mart
Circa 1984

That jacket is the reason
I'm sure that you're a man
No self-respecting girl
Would wear a jacket colored tan

Self-Portrait 1

Unhappy.
Cold.
All alone.

Despite what they say, the city does sleep
I've walked alone, everywhere I've been
In the small
And in the biggest of them all
I've been there alone
No one beside me
Happy faces and drunk foreigners everywhere I turn
Shove me in the furnace
Burn, baby, burn!

No one stands beside me
That's the simple truth
If you want to know the story,
Consult the Book of Ruth

All my bad relationships,
All my money down the drain,
Didn't get an education,
How can I complain?

Amber Romance

Amber romance,
Not even a chance
November's cold
We get close
On your long,
Beautiful legs
Amber Romance
Thought we
Had a chance
February chill
Coldest month
Of the year
Amber Romance
Drifts though my mind
Like a lost black puppy
Searching for his master
We were a disaster
Nothing could save
The sweet fragrance
Of our quiet and gentle
Amber romance

O, Canada

O, Canada
You look just like an Eskimo
Leather boots,
Lycra pants,
And feathers in your hair
Close enough to America
But with a distinctly
Foreign flair

O, Canada
Let me take your hand
Tall and slender, full of life
Our armies march to the same cadence
And everyone's wearing Ray Bans
The whole continent,
United as one
The south invades the north
The battle's just begun
It's a three-front war
Everybody dies
But when the dust clears...

O, Canada
The world is just like you
Beautiful and green
O, Canada
I'm down on bended knee
O, Canada
Let's do some LSD

Viking Wish

If I were a viking,
I'd rape and pillage
All the apartments
In New York's East Village

RocknRolla

RocknRolla to excess
Always give the world your best
Keep on going,
Night and day
Always piss your life away
Drinking drugs and fucking girls
Bathroom stalls become your world
Lick the floor and lick her thigh
Blow your mind beyond the sky
RocknRolla don't be blue,
I wish I could be like you

The Sound of Your Song

Small and powerful
Vulnerable and strong
Don't usually go together
But that's the sound of your song
The pain in your voice
Exposes your soul
The audience feels it
And for a moment,
You're whole

The sound of your song
The sound of your song
Tells all the world
Just what I've done wrong
Wrong both to you
And wrong to myself
Wrong to the one
And to somebody else

We could accept it
And all get along
If you hadn't sung it
In the sound of your song

Late Night Thought

There's alcohol
In the back of my car
I'd walk out to get it
But the way is too far
What can I do,
To relieve my distress?
I'll just close my eyes,
And hope for the best

Bill Haiku

Committed to be
Quintessentially British
But you're always wrong

Venice Beach (nothing to fear)

Blood in the cracks of the sidewalk of Venice
Woman surfing
Pigeons play dead
A homeless poet
Lives inside a rainbow house
And drinks coffee instead
The sand and the seagulls
Graffiti on the walls
People with their babies
Me
The pier
CD Sellers pushing junk
Tourists have nothing to fear

South Korea

For twenty quid,
I'd eat a squid
For fifty pence,
I'd jump the fence
For thirty bucks,
I'd buy your trucks
Now, what's the fee,
To SET ME FREE?

Table Cloth

So delicate, so lithe
Grease-soaked throughout
Stained beyond all redemption
Why did you lay out like that
Just waiting to catch the spill
Everyone thinks they'll save you
But only you know who will

The Unhappy Artist

Watching myself, my what a treat!
Were you planning on putting hot coals to my feet?
The talent, I was born with
The technique, I was taught
Unfortunately, my training wasn't
The best that could be bought
As I'm observing the cards I was dealt
I can't help wondering how The Godfather felt

Avocados

The bases going around my house
They are
They are
Everyone is avocados
They are
They are
What have they left to wish on
A star
A star
The kind of star that twinkles
Afar
Afar

Heroin

I take you in, once again
I wish that I could stop
It's unhealthy for me
But I just can't see
How there could ever be
A you without a me

As twisted King and Queen we reign
But who's the drug and who's the vein
Who's the push and who's the flow
Who the hell am I to know?

Can I get another shot
Hurts so good, I need a lot
You give me things that can't be bought
Things that make my conscience rot
Rot my soul from outside in
Addicted to your brand of sin
The brand of sin I love to use
The brand of sin that I abuse
The sin that keeps us out of heaven
All poets die at twenty-seven

Light

Yellow light
Broken shadows
Faux crystal projected on the wall
Looking up and
In the hanging light
I see you
I see me
I can see it all